Z is for Zero Limitations
When reflecting on an athletic career and any regrets, it’s rare to hear, “I was too confident.” Confidence is one of those things that, except when coupled with irresponsibility, doesn’t have a downside. And yet, it is extraordinarily elusive, particularly in girls.
This is what prompted Olympian Libby Ludlow, in 2012, to start ZGiRLS an organization predicated on the notion that girls should have Zero Limitations. At the time the 2006 Olympian and Dartmouth grad was finishing law school and realizing that she wanted something other than a career in law. Ludlow teamed up with fellow Crystal Mountain (CMAC) and USST teammate Jilyne (McDonald) Jarvis and wrote down all the things they wished they could have changed in their careers. Most notably, they wished they had female mentors to guide, support and inspire them to have confidence.
Building The Base
Locally in the Seattle area, ZGiRLS matched “Circles” of at least five girls (among them youngster Katie Hensien) with mentors, who met monthly for six months and took on various topics underlying confidence. The two quickly realized they needed to bring in some pros, and developed a curriculum committee with sport psychologists, professional athletes, curriculum developers, mental health counselors, and moms.
Together they created a curriculum that includes education and practice on topics like self-affirmations, replacing negative thoughts, communication, self-awareness, team building, nutrition, stress management and appreciating what their bodies CAN do. The aim is to recognize their strengths, and ultimately step out of their comfort zones. “Confidence can be learned,” says Jarvis.
“Their self-worth is based on what other people think and on how they perform, and it’s limiting their ability to chase down those dreams.”
Jilyne jarvis
In 2015 ZGiRLS went nationwide, launching in14 different states. The program targets 11-14-year-old girls, smack in the midst of puberty, when, according to studies, their confidence takes a permanent hit. This is when girls go from being as confident as boys, and willing to take the risks, to being vastly less confident, and avoiding the very risks that ultimately build confidence. Worse yet, girls do this to themselves.
Jarvis knows this all too well. “You would never tell a friend, ‘You can’t make it. You’re not good enough.’ But that is what girls are telling themselves all the time. Their self worth is based on what other people think and on how they perform, and it’s limiting their ability to chase down those dreams.”
Anyone who has coached girls has likely seen this, whether it is a reluctance to contribute or ask questions, fear of taking physical or social risks, or a desire to look good to peers on social media. Girls often don’t understand how lack of confidence is affecting them in simple things, like having a hard conversation with a friend. The program helps them make that link and then teaches them that building mental skills is like building any other physical skill. It takes practice.
The Magic Of Mentors
The program has morphed as it has grown. Ludlow, who welcomed her second child last month, left in 2016 to pursue her career as a brand manager at Backcountry.com. She recently launched a children’s book A-B-Skis. Her motivation behind the book was to get children to fall in love with skiing, and also, as with ZGiRLS, to help kids develop a growth mindset. “Skiing is such a great way for kids to learn the tough but important lesson about falling down and getting back up,” says Ludlow. “Through A-B-Skis, I tried to help kids learn a mindset that will help them navigate challenges both on the hill and off.”
Jarvis, whose first child (a girl) is due in January, oversees the program and the network of Mentors and Ambassadors. Girls can choose many options —from three-hour workshops to weekend camps to week-long adventure camps to Circles that meet with a mentor every other week for three months. Those six “huddles” cover all five levels of the curriculum.
“What has never changed is how we deliver it,” says Jarvis. Included in the experience is always the curriculum of tangible mental skills girls can use in life, and mentors. ZGiRLS has a surplus of “near peer” mentors, eager to engage. “I think that is because as women we recognize how important it would have been to have role models,” says Jarvis. “I wish I had female mentor to tell me ‘Hey, your quads aren’t going to fit in jeans and that’s amazing.’”
The traditionally male-dominated ski world is making the shift towards female mentors for girls. Last spring USSS hosted its first project entirely coached by women. USSS Eastern Region Youth Coach Kathy Okoniewski organized that camp and upcoming ones, and is dedicated to bringing girls together with female mentors who inspire trust. “Confidence is developed through positive experiences, nurturing environments, and sometimes challenging experiences with positive outcomes,” says Okoniewski. “A supportive network, that encourages positive self-talk and self-acceptance and love is key for young girls.” She notes how easily coaches can destroy an athlete’s confidence, through “pushing too hard when they are not ready for something or using words that can feel careless, comparative, negative or unsupportive.”
Straight From The Stars
For the ultimate confidence mentor, ZGirls has partnered with the Lindsey Vonn Foundation for six “Strong Girls Camps,” where Vonn spends an entire weekend with 50-100 girls who are learning about things like teamwork, positive thinking and respect. The latest of these camps was last August at the Under Armour facilities in Baltimore. “Her foundation does so many different things,” says Jarvis. “We love being that arm to does confidence building programs.” The partnership is a win for all, most importantly for the girls. “It’s so amazing when two organizations align in the same cause and can work together towards one goal,” says Laura Kildow, executive director of LVF. “For us, that’s building self-esteem and confidence in young girls ages 11-14. That’s when these girls need our help the most.”
ZGiRLS also does camps with WNBA star Sue Bird of the Seattle Storm. “It’s so fun working with pro athletes,” says Jarvis. “They want to give back. It gives girls that personal access to a pro, plus tacks on mental skills that they can use after the camp, for life.”
How To Get Your Z’s
Find out more about ZGiRLS, including information on starting a circle, attending a monthly 3-hour confidence-building workshop, and registering for week-long Summer Adventure Camps in Leavenworth, WA, at zgirls.org.
Give the next gen the edge on the hill and in life with a copy of Ludlow’s A-B-Skis: an alphabet book about the wonderful world of skiing.
About the Author: Edie Thys Morgan
