Readers react to Hermann’s change of nationality{mosimage}Our April Fool’s Day story, about Hermann deciding to race for the United States, garnered almost 100 e-mails from excited ski fans. Most, but not all, gathered that it was a joke.

Ski Racing was taking part for the first time in a tradition embraced by our sister publications at Inside Communications. Inside Triathlon reported yesterday that that sport could become drug-free, and VeloNews reported that WADA chairman Dick Pound was slated to take over the UCI.

Ski Racing weren’t the only ones out there with a good ski-related story up. A site called reported that Bode Miller planned a congressional run, and one of the champion’s fan sites reported that Miller was moving to the Austrian team.

Here are some of the letters Ski Racing received in response to our story about Hermann Maier’s plans to ski in the U.S. Ski Team uniform…

“Yo Serge, you April Fool. I suppose Hermann will be shacking up with Gerald Ford in Vail?? Or will he take up residence in the Game Creek Club. His rent? He must provide fresh elk every day…”

“Sure, and the Pope underwent a death-bed conversion to Islam, and Bill Clinton announces he is gay. And it’s April 1…”

“I read your article about Herman Maier skiing for the United States next year and I’m having a hard time believing it especially considering today is April fools day. I just thought it was interesting that the story got released today. I’m very curious to read the any follow up articles on this, to find out if its true or not.”

“I can understand Hermann Maier’s decision very well. I’m sure it’s less painful to be beaten by Bode Miller and Daron Rahlves if they’re your teammates. Nice to read about Schwarzenegger being involved! He and Maier probably share the lowest level of charm. Happy 1st of April from Switzerland guys!”

‘This is the kind of news that can only happen, well … once a year. This must be the biggest Austria-to-US ski event since the Von Trapps. A suggestion to the US Ski Team: publicize it with a TV ad featuring a big, sweeping helicopter shot of the Herminator climbing up an alpine trail gleefully singing “Climb Every Mountain” at the top of his lungs.
I’m assuming Benni Raich is next. After all, he sort of looks like Arnold Schwarzenegger, but slim and non-self-aggrandizing … which, I suppose, is not like Arnold Schwarzenneger at all. Oh well. Fix him up with a Bush daughter or something. The blonde one, I think.
The willingness of the US government to throw aside law, past practice and reason for the sake of world ski domination is very encouraging. My hope is that this is just the first step. After all, those European countries scarcely have armies and are kind of wimpy when it comes to using them (with the possible exception of Great Britain, but they only have like one ski racer anyway, and they ski on plastic).”

‘This might be one of the greatest stories in the history of the sport. I’d like to prompt you guys to make a list of the 10 greatest new stories in ski racing history. I would be interested to see where you rank this one.’

‘Dude, nice story about Herman Maier. I even emailed the editor, then I saw the byline. Serge Boguslavsky, nice one. F–k you’re totally going to publish my email, aren’t you?
-Charles (same one, four minutes later)

‘NO Way……..April Fools……Right……Our industry isn’t smart enough to think of bringing this much attention to the sport…..Any way today will be like buying that lottery ticket that I know I am not going to win , but sure brings on a lot of neat dreams…..I guess I will have to wait and see If it is true……Daron , Body and HERMAN could even this bring us some more NASCAR type FANS to our sport.

‘Wow! This is pretty amazing. Will this encourage Bode to form his own series or retire from the World Cup? Unfortunately, as has become the norm in sports, it’s all about the money. There is no allegiance to a national team or an athlete’s fans. I would not be a huge Bode Miller fan if he skied for Austria or another country; rather, it is because he is an American that I support him in his efforts against the best Europe can throw at him.

‘Talk about icing on the cake, this is it.’

‘I thoroughly enjoyed your (coincidentally) April 1 story on Hermann Maier’s imminent relocation. But of course you left out the most crucial information about Hermann Maier’s motivation to become an American: (1) As buddy Arnold Schwartzenegger explained, in this country, Austrians who can no longer lift weights (A) make movies; (B) get to be governor; and (C) don’t even have to pronounce correctly the name of their new home state. (2) Actual beaches, to go with the beach muscles. And (3) For the first time in your adult life, you get to hear the phrase “Hermann who?”

‘Is the Ski racing story about Hermann Maier becoming a US citizen so he can race on the US team an April Fools joke? I can’t find any other stories on the web relating to this.’

‘I a 50/50 on this story..I am willing to believe that this isn’t an April fools story, because Ski Racing magazine is too credible to run a story like that if it isn’t factual..besides, I know Herman Maier likes the Vail Valley, and what a great place for him to retire in couple of years with the$ he made from sponsorships, and become an ambassador for Vail/Beaver Creek.’

“Gentlemen, Perhaps you missed the AP news wire that announced Bide Miller’s actual plans for next season…In a shocking announcement, Bode Miller, winner of this year’s crystal globe in the overall for the most consistent ski racer in the world finally outlined his plans for next season. I a typically curt response to yet another 2006 Olympics question, Bode said, ‘You [the media] have really gotten to me. I talked about the possibility of not being on the USST next year and now I can say that I’m moving to Jamaica!’ Amid gasps and oohs, Bode continued, ‘I was contacted by a dreadlocked man in Lenzerhide after I stumbled out of a bar before the Super G. I thought, ‘just what I need!’ But to my surprise, he had a Jamaican passport and a contract for the bobsled team.’ While Bode has no bobsledding experience, the Jamaicans said, ‘Bode be ire wit us man. He be knowin’ ice better than us all and he be likin’ da speed. He also completely compatible with our substance policies. We out!…While all of the details have not been publicized, USST head Marlot said, ‘Thank god we got Herman!’
Happy April 1!”

‘If you are going to make an April fools joke, it should be believable.’

‘I looked throughout the article on Maier for the inevitable “April Fool” acknowledgement….Maier, a “Yank”?!?…was Ken Read asleep on this one?’

‘That was an awesome article on the website. Very thought out and creative. But come on, April Fools right! I mean the picture looks as if it is Hermann’s head on Daron’s body. Anyway, great trick and you guys almost had me! But if I am wrong well then that is some crazy s@#t.’

‘Right?? Serge Boguslavsky??? Bogus…..?? Too weird. Is the same as the Sidd Finch episode in SI so many years ago? If true, sad. If not true, then this is a good way to shake up the Austrians.’-Vernon
‘Serge, From one Slav to another, thank you for an exciting story…I am a first genera
tion Slovak American, and I am really into geneology. Is Boguslavsky Slovak? Just checking.’

‘Y’know, I just got off the phone with a staff member at USST, and apparently no one has a clue about this article on Hermann. Are they in denial, or is this a cruel April Fool’s joke?? It’s a good one, I must admit, especially the super imposed photo of Hermann over Bode’s jacket! They all think I’m nuts at USSA. BTW, I also work for them, so it’s not like I don’t have a clue regarding the latest stuff. Kudos to you guys, whether you fashioned this cruel joke, or got the scoop!!’

‘April Fools, right? What is next, Arnold for president? Funny this comes at a time when Bode is talking up a private team because US racers are making squat compared to othe athletes.’

‘I read your news flash on the Hermanator . You almost had me fooled , Then I just remember what today is… very good. And it’s good to see you here at the US Alpine Championships in Mammoth and with a booth . thanks for the stickers.’

‘Hahah. Very very convincing. You had me going for awhile until i read the author’s name. BOGUSlavsky. Im very impressed and ill tell every ski fan i know!’

‘Wow, I have to hand it to you guys, this is one heck of a april fool’s day joke; “Maier in full USST regalia” I would sure like to see that…’

Article Tags: Alpine



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